the absence of that feeling-
the feeling so many expecting moms get-
weighs pretty heavy.
like an empty glass
an echoing cave
what is it like to see a + and not a - ?
what is that initial feeling of "I'm knocked up!"
exactly what kind of sickness is it?
-puke my brains out? upset stomach? too many rollercoasters at lagoon ?
how hard is that first kick?
it's almost a feeling of loss-
loss of something ive never even had!
how can one feel loss when they never had it to begin with?
thankfully, that feeling is a short one-
and I remember
all of you who are praying for me...
you have no idea the overwhelming comfort that I feel from that simple act.
I really want to stress to you how understanding I am of my situation.
I am envious,
when I get news of a friend or family members pregnancy.
happy being the biggest and most overwhelming feeling of all listed-truly!!
I believe it is a true joy to be able to conceive- so why would I ever ever make anyone feel as if their insanely happy news- is anything less?
I know that when that sweet day comes, my heart will ache for those who still struggle-
But I will be HAPPY
happiness is a lifestyle,
despite my trials